Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Which one are you!!??

Saw this in a random place.

A man has 4 different types of girls..1. Wifey2. Baby Girl3. Side Piece4. Jump Off1)

Wifey is the sexiest, most successful and most respected of all thewomen. She is loved, needed and wanted by her man...she is VIRTUALLYIRREPLACEABLE.She is the girl that the guy loves and will always love, he never wants to see her with another man....BUT he will cheaton her with Baby Girl until he is mature enough to realize that ifhe gets caught or fucks up in any way and loses Wifey, he would bescrewed, and NEVER be happy again.Wifey gets along with mom, is independent, never nags, loves to dress sexy for her man, can cook and loves to keep a clean house. Wifey gets called 5 or 6 times a day.Drawback of Wifey, she loves public displays of affection...whichmight intefere with the acquisition of a Side Piece.

2) Baby Girl is ALWAYS just as hot as wifey and usually has a veryactive social life...she IS replaceable, thinks she's the nextWifey, but will only be Wifey if an extreme disaster takes place.Baby Girl gets some of the benefits of Wifey, like quality timeevery now and then and even presents on birthdays and holidays, butthats as far as it goes. The main reason to have Baby Girl is incase Wife really really fucks up, she can be replaced in a matter ofweeks because Baby Girl has been groomed to slip right into herspot. Be careful of Baby Girl, she tends to be just as attached asWifey and therefore can be dangerous to the Side Piece.Biggest benefit of Baby Girl...she is extremely private and hates causing ascene, baby girl can come into the same restaurant as you and wifeyand wifey will have no idea you two even know each other. Baby Girlis a master of disguise as well.

3) Side Piece, usually a female that the guy uses only for sex or otherpleasures, she is usually the one that he goes to for that 3some orsome late night head after the club. When Wifey is acting up and Baby Girl is at work, the Side Piece is usually the one to hold him over for a few hrs.He can meet with the Side Piece for reasons other than sex, but normally that only happens one week during the month. Side Pieces are hard to spot when they are out because mostof her friends are either Wifey's or Jump Offs.Drawback of having more than one side piece, they usually know each other somehow....we kinda think there is a or something. Try to keep your side piece count below 4 if possible.

4) Jump Off...every mans dream and worst nightmare. She is trying tomove up in life, wants to be a Side Piece or Wifey but doesnt knowhow to go about it. They are just the girls he hollas at when he is withhis boys...she is usually stored in the cell phone by a nicknamebecause he barely remembers her real name and where he met her...heonly recalls how fat her ass was. The Jump Off gets called in emergencies only, when wifey is moody, baby girl is on vacation and side piece is with her baby's father. The Jump Off is extremely dangerous in public for a number of reasons, she is usually 5 other guys jump off as well, so she might cause drama with you and one of those dudes if you slip up, she also has no problem confronting youin the mall when you are with Wifey (something that baby girl would NEVER do) and the most dangerous thing about Jump Off...She ALWAYS seems to find out where you live and or work.

I know I am the wifey material!! okeyyy!!!

Monday, February 05, 2007

old men and vixens

Been busy , school, molestations and boyfriends. yeah okay so I went to this store and I was looking Gorgeous FIINEE!!! I was getting attention from the black guys and they were like “ where do you work cos I should be working with you.” and “ I would like to do some research on your body” anywayz those types of lame lines only truly beautiful girls like me hear ohhh. I digress a lot but I have to digress now. Is it that guys can just smell a chick that has a boyfriend so they chase her because when I was single and ready to mingle. I could have flashed by boobs to the entire world and these guys wouldn’t have given me a second glance. Anywayz true to the jacked up stuff that always happens to me, do the fine guys start asking for by number . NO!! This old man that looked like James Brown (that mug shot picture) Not to speak ill of the dead or anything came over. As I saw him walking towards me I am like “God please don’t insult me like this” If a guy is talking to you that mean he thinks he has a chance with you . So this old man really wanted to holler at a sister. I tried to act as if I was talking on the phone. Anyway he came sha and convo went like this.

old man: are you bothered by the guys?

omo naija: no, they are just playing

then the inevitable

old man; where are you from?

omo naija : Nigeria

Old man: I have a son inlaw from Kenya I have my grandsons picture here

he proceeded to look through his wallet but he couldn’t find the picture. thank God. I mean who told this man that I card to see the picture of his grandson

anyway YOB called my phone just in the nick of time. That’s what bobo’s are for sha.

too tired to write more but I have leant that you shouldn’t date your friends brother especially if they have petty sibling rivalry. My gosh !! both of them want to kill me. but before I sign out . Here is something for my favorite blogger naija vixen

you know we are like sisters

through the net I felt our connection

if they were two akara balls left I would give you the last one

even my favorite puff puff will be yours

like Nicole richie and paris Hilton we are Best Friends For Life.

ok have I buttered you up enough!! so naija vixen the beautiful, the talented, the greatest, the nicest,I am in love with d’banj. I know you don’t post music anymore on your blog but I need his music. PLEASE I am on my knees (Seriously ) send his songs/ cd to me. I cant find it anywhere , and don’t say I should buy it cause I am a broke college student. I mean last night when I was with YOB in bed I cried out D’banj!! anyway that lead to a lot of explanation. Ok ok that didn’t really happen but I was thinking of d’banj. I want to have little kokolets and koko masters with him

thanks babes!!!